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Connected
2001-07-27-8:57 a.m.
Well, unless you're psycho enough to check my diary every 2 minutes, you wouldn't know that I've done 3 entries in a row today. So go to the last two and read them first. My final little blurb is about the girl situation. Remember when I said you always have to end up apoligizing, even when you haven't done anything wrong? Well, another argument, but this time I didn't apoligize. Well, not exactly. I did suck up my anger and not let her have it as much as I wanted to. Its easy to burn bridges but hard to build them back. I try to never sever a relationship with fanfare or drama, especially not with a good friend. So I said I was sorry the whole thing happened, but never admitted any wrongdoing on my part, because there simply was none. And, like any argument, it was over something completely stupid. You sorta gotta build up trust over time, no matter how much you hit it off, it just takes time and experience. So I'm glad the whole thing is cool again, I didn't want it to end, but I'm a stubborn fucking bastard if ever you met one, so it's quite a feat. This has been a major thing in my life for the past few days, but I don't mention it because it's very important and personal. Only now, in hindsight is it mentioned, because it's over. And because this girl will probably never read this diary. You know what the problem with my job is? Not enough room for creativity. It's either fixed, or it's not. Other than quality of work and attention to detail, theres not much room for it to vary. Sidenote: You know what's good? That feeling when you're cleaning your ears with a q-tip. Ohhhh yeah baby, that's it, that's the spot, right there, yeah. ;-) "No, you don't know what you would give up. You don't know, what you want, it may take you years to find out. You don't know, what you need, it's something that may never come to you." (Disconnected, by Face to Face) It's about how being disconnected from yourself can leave you unhappy, and unaware of what you want and what makes you happy. If you don't stop to think about what you want, how the fuck can you ever get it? "No, you don't know what you will give up..." -- Ronnie
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