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aaaaah. Ranting again. Feels good. Feels good.
2003-02-25-7:17 p.m.
Still no progress to report, so still no reason to type up a real entry. Of course there must be something, otherwise why would I be typing here? My mood right now, could only be characterized as malcontent. This is no doubt compounded by the fact that I have been drinking, but it largely due to the fact that events have conspired to get-on-my-fucking-nerves today, none the least of which being my job. I'm sick of my fucking job. I'm horribly underpaid for the work I do, and capable of a lot more than the things I do anyway. I'm usually so bored, that I go out and find things to do just so I don't feel like I'm wasting my time sitting in my office. Which isn't even an office anyway, it's a fucking big room with no windows tucked away in a corner with hundreds of thousands of dollars in computer equipment and literally probably 30,000 wires coming into it. The shit I do amazes people, literally. Anyone who knows jack and steps in there is usually slackjawed in amazement at the complexity of that room. And this is just one facet of what I can do. I don't just do technical work, I can write better than 90 percent of people, draw better than probably 90 percent of people, read fast with near total comprehension, paint, sculpt, design and improve. I know more than a little about more than a lot, and I'm exceedingly good at dealing with people and maintaing a calm, professional attitude at all times. I've worked in some way in almost every major field out there, and I can do just about every job at my company of 1000 people. So why the fuck can't I get a better job? Sure, the market is crap right now, after the Enron collapse there are tons of people with some of my skills in the market here, and I am just barely sustaining myself with what I make, something due largely to my own ingenuity. In my defense, a large part of it has to do with not getting stuck in a boring job, or with boring people again. I spent a year and a half working in the smallest, most boring shithole of a building with the most boring people you could imagine. You have no idea. I need to do an entry on this sometime, seriously. Or on all of the horrible jobs I've held down over my short but lively working career. But to wrap this up now, because I need to finish watching the move I rented and because there's no point in getting too worked up right now: I'm going to keep holding out for a good job, because I can get one if I'm patient but not afraid to take the risk when I know the time is right. And if worse comes to worse, I can always just draw unemployment, do some side work for extra cash, and get a much needed vacation. All I have to do is breathe, eat, and sleep. The rest is just details. The rest is just details Ronnie, now enjoy your beer.
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