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a lot of info, but it's all pretty good I think
2003-01-08-8:39 a.m.
So much has happened. I don't like writing in this thing much anymore. I said last time I was going to chronicle the NYC trip in more detail, but I haven't really felt like it, maybe someday. The quick and dirty version is that I loved it. New York is nice, but Manhattan is still great. I love it, but I don't know if I could ever live there. I do know I'd like to spend more time there, but I think I'd like to keep my roots somewhere with a little more freedom. At any rate, it's hardly a big scary city. It's a lot easier to get around in and do things in than houston is, that's for sure. This was the first time I really got to spend any time with paige's family, and they're all very nice, very honest people. I think her grandparents are great too. Her mother is the only one that I really have any difficulty with. She's the only one Paige has any difficulty with too. As far as Paige and I go, we sorta split up. Not in an angry, hateful, or negative way at all though. It's really quite mutual. It all boils down to the distance thing. It takes a lot to maintain a relationship over such a long distance, and even when she's down here on breaks from school, we have a tendency to hang out a lot to try and make up for the time when we're apart. So we'll still hang out, and go out on dates when we can see each other, yeah, but once she goes back to Austin this weekend, we're really no longer boyfriend/girlfriend. If one of us meets someone, then it happens. I'm pretty sure I'll find someone else, but I'm not anxious to get back into another serious relationship right now. And I think it will take a long time before I come across another person with all the great qualities that she has. I don't regret anything about our time together. I'm glad we met, glad we went out for that amazing summer, and glad that we decided to stay together after she left for school. But we both need to get on with our lives and take our next steps. Maybe we'll continue to evolve in ways that make us better people, and we'll become even more compatible than we are now. Maybe when all is said and done, we'll end up back together someday. Personally, I'm really ready to move on in other parts of my life too. I still like living where I do, and I get along with my roommates just great, but I'm ready to move up to Houston now. I didn't think I'd outgrow that part of my life so quickly, but I knew it was going to happen. I want to get a better job too, and as tight as the market is for technology people right now, it's 100 times better in Houston than it is out here. I won't move until I get settled into a new job, and at the soonest that probably won't be for a few months, but the important thing is that I've really set my mind to it. I'm also looking forward to spending time with my a few of my friends I haven't seen in a while. Jerry and Clyde and the other Jerry, James and Deck and JC and Matt and the other Matt. It's not that Paige held me back from doing any of those things, but that I would just always rather do nothing with her, than something without her. So that's about it for now. I have to get to work. I'm off tomorrow but I have to work this weekend. But that's not so bad, because once I finish my work on sunday, I'm going to spend the day watching movies in my office and playing around online. Sometimes I can't believe I actually want to leave this job. Then I get my paycheck, and it all comes rushing back to me.
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